"Popular applause veers with the wind."
"Life is something like a trumpet. If you don't put anything in, you won't get anything out."
W. C. Handy
"Take the juice of two quarts of whisky..."
, hangover cure
"When suffering knocks at your door and you say there is no seat for him, he tells you not to worry because he has brought his own stool."
"Travel, instead of broadening the mind, often merely lengthens the conversation."
"I can't believe that out of 100,000 sperm, you were the quickest."
, to a heckler
"The only reason they come to see me is that I know that life is greatand they know I know it."
(was married to Carole Lombard)
"Wait a minute."
US Rep (TX)
(same dates as Alan Watts)
, on the three most important words in the English language
"So much of what we do as artists is a combination of personal experience and imagination, and how that all creeps into your work is not so linear."
Canadian singer, pianist
(married to Elvis Costello)
"I'm glad I don't have to face that guy every day. He has that look that few hitters have. I don't know if it's his stance, his eyes or what, but you can tell he means business."
US baseball player (pitcher)
, on Don Mattingly
"I'd just like to see a role for women where someone who isn't traditionally attractive is not portraying the best friend. You know, the character that only speaks in questions. 'Gee, are you gonna go out with him? Do you think I look fat?"
(daughter of Keith Carradine;
granddaughter of John Carradine)
"You find out that the universe is a system that creeps up on itself and says 'Boo!' and then laughs at itself for jumping."
(same dates as Sam Rayburn)
"You're invited to tons of parties, and you'll wear these shoes and that dress, and it can be enticing, but I think it also sucks you dry. If you do it a little, sure, it's fun, but too much and you start to lose your footing."
(sister of Jake Gyllenhaal)
, on stardom
"I feel like every time I tweet, I lose money."
US comic actor (SNL)
"Concentrated power is not rendered harmless by the good intentions of those who create it."