"Remember, a chip on the shoulder is a sure sign of wood higher up."
US religious leader
"Life is a long headache in a noisy street."
"Yes, I've been in your living room many times."
, when asked by strangers "Do I know you?"
"They laughed when I said I was going to be a comedian. Well, they're not laughing now."
English comic, writer
"It seemed that my wife Shirley was always pregnant until we found out what was causing it."
, on why she never toured with him
"I knew at an early age I wanted to act. Acting was always easy for me. I don't believe in predestination, but I do believe that once you get wherever it is you are going, that is where you were going to be. Was I always going to be here? No I was not. I was going to be homeless at one time, a taxi driver, truck driver, or any kind of job that would get me a crust of bread. You never know what's going to happen."
"Foolish writers and readers are created for each other."
Sir Hugh Walpole
"We were barred from so many hotels, the entire Holiday Inn chain, that we had to check in as Fleetwood Mac lots of times."
English guitarist (Birds, Faces, Rolling Stones)
, on touring with the Small Faces
"As long as art is the beauty parlor of civilization, neither art nor civilization is secure."
US educator, philosopher
"Hello from the cracks in the sidewalks of NYC and from the ants that dwell in these cracks and feed in the dried blood of the dead that has settled into the cracks."
David "Son of Sam" Berkowitz
US serial killer
"Now that I look back, I realize that a life predicated on being obedient and taking orders is a very comfortable life indeed. Living in such a way reduces to a minimum one's own need to think."
German war criminal
"One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar."
"Nothing that is worth anything can be achieved in a lifetime; therefore we must be saved by hope."
"You should spend your money on some nice lingerie. Big wool cotton pants, that just doesn't work. You have to feel sexy."
(was married to Seal)
"What I have to say is far more important than how long my eyelashes are."
(was engaged to Ryan Reynolds)
"No more turkey, but I'd like some more of the bread it ate."
US cartoonist (Dennis the Menace)
"An Edwardian lady in full dress was a wonder to behold, and her preparations for viewing were awesome."
"We must never confuse elegance with snobbery."
French Algerian designer