April 11

"Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves."

Confucius
(09/28/0551 – 04/11/0479 BC)
Chinese philosopher

"Thomas Gray walks as if he had fouled his small-clothes and looks as if he smelt it."

Christopher Smart
(04/11/1722 – 05/21/1771)
English writer

"Give me the avowed, the erect, the manly foe,
Bold I can meet—perhaps may turn his blow;
But of all plagues, good Heaven, thy wrath can send,
Save, save, oh save me from the Candid Friend."

George Canning
(04/11/1770 – 08/08/1827)
British PM (19)

"If this boy passes the examinations he will be admitted; and if the white students choose to withdraw, all the income of the college will be devoted to his education."

Edward Everett
(04/11/1794 – 01/15/1865)
US educator , on admitting the first black student to Harvard

"Cats don't caress us—they caress themselves on us."

Antoine de Rivarol
(06/26/1753 – 04/11/1801)
French writer

"When we lose the right to be different, we lose the privilege to be free."

Charles Evans Hughes
(04/11/1862 – 08/27/1948)
US Secretary of State, Supreme Court justice

"Make 'em laugh; make 'em cry; make 'em wait."

Charles Reade
(06/08/1814 – 04/11/1884)
English writer

"The first requirement of a statesman is that he be dull. This is not always easy to achieve."

Dean Acheson
(04/11/1893 – 10/12/1971)
US secretary of state

"The scientists split the atom; now the atom is splitting us."

Quentin Reynolds
(04/11/1902 – 03/17/1965)
US writer (same dates as Oleg Cassini)

"I'm a half-assed celebrity—everyone knows Brenda Starr but nobody knows me."

Dale Messick
(04/11/1906 – 04/05/2005)
US cartoonist (died near her birthday)

"If you are going to do something wrong, at least enjoy it."

Leo Rosten
(04/11/1908 – 02/19/1997)
Polish-US humorist

"To be well dressed is a little like being in love."

Oleg Cassini
(04/11/1913 – 03/17/2006)
French fashion designer (was married to Gene Tierney; same dates as Quentin Reynolds)

"The secret of good writing is to say an old thing in a new way or to say a new thing in an old way."

Richard Harding Davis
(04/18/1864 – 04/11/1916)
US writer (son of Rebecca Harding Davis; died near his birthday)

"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem."

Theodore Isaac Rubin
(04/11/1923 – 02/16/2019)
US writer

"I don't feel good."

Luther Burbank
(03/07/1849 – 04/11/1926)
US botanist , last words

"If women can sleep their way to the top, how come they aren't there? There must be an epidemic of insomnia out there."

Ellen Goodman
(04/11/1941 – )
US journalist

"I don't trust or love anyone. Because people are so creepy. Creepy creepy creeps. Creeping around. Creeping here and creeping there. Creeping everywhere. Crippity crappity creepies."

Vincent Gallo
(04/11/1961 – )
US actor (LTR with Chloë Sevigny)

"Now, ride off in all directions."

Michael Curtiz
(12/24/1886 – 04/11/1962)
US film director , directing Gary Cooper in a western

"George [Gershwin] died on July 11, 1937, but I don't have to believe that if I don't want to."

John O'Hara
(01/31/1905 – 04/11/1970)
US writer
("Appointment in Samarra")

"I would change the push for women to look like Playmate Barbie dolls; that is just ridiculous."

Tricia Helfer
(04/11/1974 – )
Canadian model, actor , on one thing she would change about the film industry

"Even if happiness forgets you a little bit, never completely forget about it."

Jacques Prevert
(02/04/1900 – 04/11/1977)
French writer

"A well-composed book is a magic carpet on which we are wafted to a world that we cannot enter in any other way."

Caroline Gordon
(10/06/1895 – 04/11/1981)
US writer

"To me there is no such thing as creative writing. It's either good writing, whatever the subject, or it's not creative."

Erskine Caldwell
(12/17/1903 – 04/11/1987)
US writer (was married to Margaret Bourke-White)

"All persons, living or dead, are purely coincidental, and should not be construed."

Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.
(11/11/1922 – 04/11/2007)
US writer (same dates as Jonathan Winters)

"If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it."

Jonathan Winters
(11/11/1925 – 04/11/2013
US comic actor (same dates as Kurt Vonnegut)