"Some folk are wise, and some are otherwise."
"I will go anywhere, as long as it be forward."
Dr. David Livingstone
Scottish missionary, explorer (I presume)
"Writing is learning to say nothing, more cleverly every day."
"The most important lesson I learned was that the winner of a gunplay usually was the one who took his time."
"Do not compute the totality of your poultry population until all the manifestations of incubation have been entirely completed."
William Jennings Bryan
US Secretary of State
"I am sitting in the smallest room of my house. I have your review before me. In a moment, it will be behind me."
, in a letter to critic Rudolph Louis
(the Fourth Earl of Sandwich made a very similar witticism in 1785)
"There ain't nothin' an ol' man can do but bring me a message from a young one."
"Whan that Aprilly with hise shoures soote
The droghte of March had perced to the roote,
I druv a motor thro' Aprilly's bliz
Somme forty mile, and dam neere lyke to friz."
Bert Leston Taylor
"Last night I dreamed I ate a ten-pound marshmallow, and when I woke up the pillow was gone."
"The kid doesn't chew tobacco, smoke, drink, curse, or chase broads. I don't see how he can possibly make it."
US baseball player
"The road to hell is paved with works-in-progress."
"If the role demands it, then naturally I will remove my clothes."
(was married to John Derek)
"Do you want to trace your family tree? Run for public office."
Patricia H. Vance
US Senator (R-PA)
"I really think that effective acting has to do literally with the movement of molecules."
"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars."
German-born US actor
(was married to Demi Moore)
, distilling the pros and cons of being male
"If you pick up some paint with your brush and make somebody's nose with it, this is rather ridiculous when you think of it, theoretically or philosophically. It's really absurd to make an image, like a human image, with paint, today."
Willem de Kooning
"The greatest tragedy in mankind's entire history may be the hijacking of morality by religion."
Sir Arthur C. Clarke
English scientist, writer
"The day I need a television puppet or clown to tell my children what's right and what's wrong, I'll bow out as a mother."
"When you stop drinking, you have to deal with this marvelous personality that started you drinking in the first place."