"There once was an old man of Lyme
who married three wives at a time
when asked, 'Why a third?'
he replied 'One's absurd!
and bigamy, sir, is a crime!'"
William Cosmo Monkhouse
"How horrible, fantastic, incredible, it is that we should be digging trenches and trying on gas-masks here because of a quarrel in a faraway country between people of whom we know nothing."
English PM (40)
"Great fleas have little fleas
upon their backs to bite 'em;
and little fleas have lesser fleas,
and so ad infinitum."
Augustus de Morgan
("Budget of Paradoxes")
, on the invention of the microscope, referencing Swift
"You can never lose anything that really belongs to you, and you can't keep that which belongs to someone else."
"A few, a few, too few for drums and yells,
May creep back, silent, to still village wells
Up half-known roads."
English soldier, writer
("Dulce et Decorum est")
"I don't think I'd ever get anything more than a very small role. 'The Prince of the Cameos,' they might call me."
"A healthy adult male bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience."
"If you're not confused, you're not paying attention."
"Cinema never saved anyone's life, it is not a medicine that will save anyone's life. It is only an aspirin."
("The Fifth Element")
(was married to Milla Jovovich)
"Beauty is not just a white girl. It's so many different flavors and shades."
US rapper, actor
"You know you're drunk when you think that the cab fare is the time."